A Letter to Jack!
by MyKa HoLLy
Summary: The story of Jack and Spot's relationship with a few weird twists. SLASH chapter 3 now up!
1. The Letter

Jack,

Here I am, drunk again. Seems like all I do is drink after you left. It was me doing the breaking up but it still hurts. I just saw that we weren't going anywhere. I know you miss me. I know you still think about me. I can see it in your eyes whenever I see you. It's like you just lost the most important person in your life. It breaks my heart to see you that way. I just want you to know that.

I realize that I'm the leader of Brooklyn and I aint supposed to have no feelings, but it hurts everytime I look at you and see that vacant look in your eyes. God, Jack! If you only knew how much it hurt. I set you on your own way. We weren't getting anywhere together. God! If my boys knew you'd be six feet under by now. You didn't act too happy anyways. You acted like we was over before we'd hardly begun. I coulda spent my life with you Jack, just want you to know.

God! I'm so drunk right now. I can't even read half of what I'm writing. It's like you stole everything away from me. I feel empty inside. I know I ain't making no sense but you understood me when no one else could. You were my savior Jack. I don't know if you know that but you was.

I love you more than words can possibly say. I would have died for you, Jack. I already lived for you. Jack, baby, you need to know that since we split all I can think about is you. I wonder if we left things too early. We was just beginning. I knew you had problems, and so did I, but we could have worked them out together.

God Baby! I wish you were here so I could hold you. Kiss you. That's all I wanna do right now. I miss you so damn much. I hope you aint found no one new, though I know it'd probably be good for you. I'm still waiting on you. You needed to find your place. You needed to grow up and realize who you are.

Baby boy, you don't realize how hard this is to write when you are drunk, but I think that if I was sober I'd never have the balls. These things need to be said. You need to know that I will never be over you. It's a shame that you pushed me away, but I'll be there again when you need me. I'm always there for you Jacky Boy. I love you. You know that. You know me probably better than anyone else. I kinda need that in my life. It's too miserable without you. I hope you grow up soon because I need you here with me. I do. I, Spot Conlon, need you above all others. You are my light when I've been stuck in the dark. You're everything to me.

I hope this letter reaches you in time, before it's too late to save us. Goddamnit babe. Everytime I think of you I think of everything I'm missing out on now. We were good together, don't you think? I hope that look in your eyes never goes away. Not the look you have now - that one breaks my heart, but the look you had whenever I was around. Your eyes were so bright. I could always see everything in your eyes. I could see the love in your eyes and I love knowing that you want me still. It's the only thing that gets me through the days I spend without you. Damn Jack! Do you see what you have done to me? I've become one of those sappy love dopes that I used to make fun of. I can't help it though. You've got my heart in your hands and I belong to you. I hope you get over whatever it is that you're going through so that we can be together again. I know without a doubt in my mind that you love me, maybe as much as I love you. I just wish that I knew what was going through your mind right now. I won't be able to leave you alone for much longer. You know that. I'm impatient. I can't stand to wait.

Jack, when you come back to me, it'll be heaven sent. I don't know what that means right now but it seemed to fit. What I mean is that when you come back to me, or when I come crawling back to you (which I'm half tempted to do right now) it'll be the best day of my life. Maybe not the best day. There are other days I've spent with you that can easily compete but it'll be wonderful. I can't wait to have you back in my arms. My bed feels so empty without you. God! I miss spending the night with you at your place. It was heaven on earth. Damn! I use that word alot when it comes to you. I don't ever use it when I aint talking bout you. I love you Jack. I guess that's what I'm trying to say. You are the air when I can't breathe. Damn Jack! You mean everything to me.

When you get this, if you feel like you need to talk, I'll be waiting for you. You know where I'll be. If I'm not at the Lodging House, try the docks. You know how I like it out there. We'll be away from prying eyes there anyway. I love you Jacky Boy. Please come find me, because I think that I am lost without you.

I love you,  
Spot 


	2. Spot's POV

** My palms were sweaty as I shook hands with Jack, quickly stuffing the letter into his hand. I knew I couldn't take it back now that he had it. If I tried, he'd only read it right then and there. It's better to just leave and let him read it, than fight with him. We've been doing too much of that anyways lately. You'd never know that we was in love by the way we acted. Oh well. What's done is done.**

** The walk back to Brooklyn seemed to take forever. I had knots in my stomach and my head was swimming with what ifs. I was so sure when I wrote that letter that he was still in love with me, but as I crossed the bridge back into my own territory, it hit me. What if I was wrong? I could have mistaken the things I thought I saw for something else. God! I could be so utterly screwed after this. It was always a rule. You don't write what you don't want people to know. God! The thought alone terrified me. Jacky Boy could be showing my deepest, darkest secrets with the whole of Manhattan right now. What was I thinking?**

** "Spot!"**

** I jumped. It only took me a moment to realize it was one of my younger boys. I stared at him for a moment, wondering what he was thinking. Everyone knew better to interrupt me when I was thinking, but then again, I hadn't exactly declared that was what I was doing, and some of these boys ain't so bright. I decided to humor him, rather than berate him for scaring the shit out of me.**

** The boy, as it turns out, hadn't done very good selling that day, and needed to borrow money so that he could stay in the lodging house, instead of out on the streets. I respected the kid's nerve in asking me. It had to have taken balls, or maybe the kid just didn't know any better. Either way, I couldn't let a 10 year old sleep in an alley. There were far too many bad people in Brooklyn for me to allow that to happen. He'd be dead before sun up, or worse. The front page everyday this week had been about a rash of killings. There was a psycho murderer roaming the streets, and guess who he decided to target. It just wasn't safe for us anymore. There were theories that maybe Pulitzer had gone mad when he was beaten by a bunch of kids, street rats and factory workers. If I was him, I would have gone insane. The most powerful man in New York City brought down by kids - his own newsies at that! It was laughable. There was a sense of irony about the whole thing, but I didn't buy into the stories. They were tales made up out of boredom, nothing more.**

** I took the boy, Scraps, with me to the home. It was getting late and it would be dark soon. No use getting stuck out in the dark with a killer on the loose, not that anyone would be stupid enough to come after me. It's still better to be safe than sorry.**

** Nights in the Brooklyn Lodging House were never easy. My boys were strong and emotionless during the day, but during the night, their fears came to life. It was surprising how many of the boys were terrified of the dark. They'd lay awake half the night watching the shadows move on the walls. That was nothing, though, compared to the screams and mumbling incoherent words that slipped past lips of sleeping boys. It was near impossible to sleep. Usually I slept alone, on a couch in the main room, just to be away from them. Truth be told, they scared me. The last thing you need in the middle of the night when you're trying to sleep is a sleep-talker begging for his life. It'll kinda scare the sleep right outta your system.**

** I wondered if I talked in my sleep. No one ever told me that I did, but really, even if I did, they wouldn't tell me. I don't know if it was out of respect or fear. I was happier not knowing, but either way, I wasn't getting any sleep tonight. My mind was on Jack and the letter. Honestly, I was terrified, completely scared out of my mind. I didn't know what I expected when I gave it to him. I should have burnt it or thrown it in the river. Anything but what I did.**

** Morning came too soon after a restless night and I couldn't afford to skip out on selling. I had barely been able to afford to keep that kid off the streets the night before, and I desperately needed the money. Besides, I needed something to take my mind off of Jack - anything to distract me. I was going crazy thinking about him.**

** I had no sooner gotten my morning papers, than I feel a hand on my shoulder. I'd be lying if I said it didn't take a lot of practice to keep from screaming. No one touches me, and I have reasons for it. This person had to be a dumbass to be touching me now and taking me by surprise. I turned around and couldn't help but smirk. Yeh.. I was right. Total dumbass.

* * *

**

WOOHOO! I wrote a second chapter to a story! I'm soo good! Yee haw! Seriously, I'm a cowgirl, ask anyone. :-P I want to thank NewsieGoil1899 for her review. I LOVE U GIRL! Okay, but I totally NEED feedback on this story cuz it's like my first chaptered fic in this fandom. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! If ya do it, I'll give ya a cookie... hmmm? sound good?

Anyways, there's a button down here that says "_SUBMIT REVIEW_". **USE IT!** luv yas!

-myka


	3. fluffiness?

_AN: this story contains SLASH. don't like? don't read. big thanks goes out to those of you who reviewed (much appreciated). i luv yall! please do it again:) sorry this took so long. too many crazy ideas in my head. _

_**READ ON!**_

* * *

**Letter to Jack : Chapter 3**

Those eyes, even plagued as they were by dark circles, were beautiful, and those lips. There wasn't a word wonderful enough to describe them. Jack couldn't help but smile. He had missed Spot more than he had realized. Seeing him so close and knowing that Spot was feeling the same way, it was almost heaven. There was just one thing missing. One thing that took every ounce of Jack's will power to resist doing right then and there. The love of his life, after what had seemed like an eternity in his absence, was standing mere inches away. He wanted more than anything to reach out and pull his lover into his arms and kiss him with all the intensity he was feeling.

"Uh, Jack," Spot's voice broke through his thoughts and served to broaden Jack's already brilliant smile.

It took Jack a moment to realize that his hand was still laying on Spot's shoulder. After that, it only took a second for him to realize that they were far from alone. About a dozen of Spot's newsies were staring at them, glaring daggers at Jack.

Jack smiled sheepishly and pulled his hand away, slowly so it didn't look so obvious. He spat quickly into his hand and Spot did the same, taking Jack's hand and shaking it firmly. He let go almost instantly, and Jack's smile fell a little at the loss of contact.

With a single look at his newsboys, Spot heaved his stack of papers into a more comfortable position, then motioned with his head for Jack to follow him. Jack did so quickly, almost like a puppy following his master.

The alley was narrow and dirty, but it did not matter. Only one thing mattered at that moment in time. Jack and Spot were together at long last.

It was Jack that made the first move, glancing quickly up and down the alley for trespassers, and attaching himself to Spot's parted lips. Hands were suddenly everywhere, exploring territory that they hadn't felt for so long. Shirts were quickly untucked and fingertips glided over smooth taut stomach muscles and fingernails scratched lightly down their backs.

Jack had to tear himself away, panting from the lack of oxygen. Spot took the opportunity to back Jack into the brick wall of the alley. His lips met Jack's neck, spreading quick kisses from Jack's ear to his collarbone, using his hand to move the bandana out of the way to get at the sensitive spot it covered. A low moan escaped Jack's lips, and Spot nibbled and sucked at the delicative skin. Jack's fingers ran through Spot's hair and all across his back, sending shivers down Spot's spine. Spot hissed against Jack's throat and bit just a little harder, pressing himself fully up against Jack's hard body.

Spot's world was spinning all around him. The only thing that remained was Jack. Everything else was a blur. Nothing else mattered. He knew only of the feeling of Jack's hands all over his body and the taste of Jack's sweet skin. He was swimming in the ecstacy of it. Low moans escaped as the friction built between their bodies. He could feel Jack's hands grabbing his ass as he thrust up against him.

"I love ya, Spot," Jack said breathily, before attacking Spot's lips with his own. He sucked softly at Spot's bottom lip, feeling Spot's cock twitch against his through the worn layers of clothing. He smiled through the kiss, loving the way he could make Spot feel. He was the only one who could make Spot lose control. Their tongues met between parted lips, dancing the way only two people truly in love could. Their styles were perfectly attuned to each other. Jack loved Spot's mouth. The things the boy could do with that mouth were amazing.

"Ahem."

The cough seemed to echo loudly through the alley. Both boys were suddenly diving backwards away from each other, eyes wide. Their lips were bruised and swolen, their clothes in wild disarray. They stared at each other for a moment in horror. There was no way in hell they could get caught today. It wasn't fair.

"My, my what have we here?" The thick New York accent cut through the tension, igniting a different kind of passion from the shorter newsboy.

Spot saw red. "Race," Spot seethed through gritted teeth as his hands balled into fists. "You're dead. I'm gonna fuckin' murder ya!" He was shaking. He was furious. He went to move towards Race, fully intending on making good on his promise, when two arms suddenly seized him, wrapping around his own arms and pinning them to his sides.

"Spot," Jack said, trying his best to coax Spot into calming down. He knew full well that Spot could easily slip out of his arms. Spot was good like that. But he knew that Spot wouldn't hurt him, so that left Spot held tightly in Jack's arms, still shaking in anger. "He didn't mean nothin' by it."

"I was tryin to warn you guys. Spot's boys is lookin for him." Race explained. It was as close to an apology as either of them would get from Racetrack.

Jack had no sooner let go of Spot than two of Spot's biggest newsies turned the corner into sight. They didn't look too happy. Neither of them particularly liked Jack. It didn't matter to Jack, though. He didn't like them either.

Spot turned his glare to his own boys, staring them down hard. They weren't really afraid of him. They just knew better than to mess with him when he was pissed off. It was common sense.

Jack let his fingers brush against Spot's as he moved to join Race. He placed a hand on Racetrack's shoulder, nudging him to follow as Jack walked on. "Hey Spot," Jack called over his shoulder. "We'll see you in 'Hattan later right?"

"Yeah, I'll be over," Spot called back.

As soon as they were out of sight, Racetrack burst out laughing. "You guys looked like a couple of dumbasses. Your eyes went all wide and everythin'. Priceless."

Jack grinned and let out a laugh of his own. "You'se just jealous."

* * *

_AN: kinda fluffy rite? tell me what y'all think. seriously. _

_once again there is this little button down here that says "REVIEW". use it! please? pretty please?_


End file.
